Anonyme (Baby aged 8 months, France)

Introduction

I have worked in the field of early childhood for 10 years, 5 years in a facility and 5 years as a childcare provider. I never had any problems. I have two children aged 8 and 4.

The Day Everything Changed

The child was doing very well the day before; he was full of energy. On that day, however, he was calm, not moving at all, and abandoning toys without even trying to retrieve them. He only drank his bottles.

I placed the child in a seated position on his crib bed. Since he couldn’t sit up by himself yet, he tipped backward but neither cried nor reacted otherwise. He continued playing with his teddy bear. Half an hour later, I set him up for snack time and when I gave him his compote, he started screaming, crying, and having a seizure. Fortunately, he came to quickly. Unfortunately, I didn’t call the emergency services; I was waiting for the father to come pick him up to explain what had happened and advise him to go to the ER. He followed my advice.

At the ER, they asked if the child had fallen. At first glance, he had a big bump then a fracture on his head. I was placed under arrest where I was questioned about a possible fall. I repeated that the child hadn’t fallen. Eventually, the experts declared there was neither a palpable bump upon arrival nor a fracture and therefore concluded that he had simply been shaken.

When the Diagnosis Came

He had a scan and an X-ray. At first, they talked about a fracture and a possible fall, but all of this disappeared. They are now on Shaken Baby Syndrome (SBS).

I didn’t hear from the parents again the next day, which made me realize something was happening. I never thought it would go so far until one morning someone knocked at my door and placed me under arrest (GAV). It was very hard for me to understand what was going on. During my GAV, I was extensively questioned about a fall and a fracture. They asked me once about SBS and I answered them, but they remained stuck on the fall, which was completely ruled out by the categorical experts on SBS.

Honestly, I am completely lost. My parents have somewhat strange behavior in some ways: they took a video of their son at 6:30 AM and 8:30 AM on the same morning as the incident and a photo five minutes before dropping him off with me, which proves that the child was doing well according to the experts. Since he had an episode at my place in the evening, it proves to them that it’s me. I know I didn’t shake him; I would never do something like that.

In the Judicial Machine

I was indeed placed under arrest (GAV). I stayed there for a night and got out the next noon. Since then, I have appeared before the judge twice and am now waiting for the counter-expertise which should arrive soon as we requested it, but the parents opposed with their lawyer. They addressed 32 pages to the judge explaining why they were against the counter-expertise, but the judge accepted anyway.

Living Under Suspicion

Honestly, I have had a lot of support from my family and partner. Fortunately, they are still here today because this is the toughest trial of my life and it’s still ongoing as it isn’t over yet. The hardest impact for me has been to stop working and no longer be able to take care of my children. I chose this profession to be able to take care of mine full-time, but unfortunately, I can no longer practice this job and have lost the desire to do so. I stayed unemployed for one and a half years because I didn’t want to leave my children; it was too hard for me.

In July this year, I decided to open my self-employment business and try working from home to always stay close to my children. The financial aspect is difficult despite the significant legal fees for something I did not do.

What has changed today is our view of people and things in the world. We are very afraid of what’s next; we don’t know how this story will end. I see many people convicted even though they claim their innocence, which is very scary. The uncertainty of not knowing how it will end and if I’ll still be with my family weighs on me. I sleep poorly and eat much less than before, but I try to hold on for my family who supports me.

For consistency across testimonies, this text may have been slightly edited or translated by artificial intelligence. If you notice any error or inconsistency, please don’t hesitate to contact us.

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